i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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