Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
