So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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