Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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