I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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