I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
