I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Sober January is a disaster.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Randomize
