I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
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im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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