so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
