Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize