once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
