When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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