can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
