nut hugger
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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