No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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