***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
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