so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
