Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize