There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
