I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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