Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
