sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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