Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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