i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
