your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize