walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
