Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
