You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Enjoy the penises
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.