Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Randomize
