just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
