another moral hangover. fuck.
My hand turned me down
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
