omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize