We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
