btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
