Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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