hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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