This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
dude. I can hear the air.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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