If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize