I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
