Can Purell be used as lube?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
