Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Walk of Shame today included voting.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
