I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
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