I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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