last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
