The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
