Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize