Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Randomize