Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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