It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
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