11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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